Vohu Manu

Pack the car. Check the water & oil. Hmm, almost no oil, that's a problem. It drank five litres, must have been very low indeed. Start late, but I guess that's not so bad, we've only got a day of driving ahead.

Stop at Woodbine for camping gear. Everyone very impressed by period style photo of the family when I was twelve. Also impressed by photo of dad as a young revhead. I try to explain that the only varieties of jeans you could buy in the 70's were tight ones. BJ upset to have to skip the trip for exams, we wish him luck.

Naaa na na nana nana na na Katamari Damacy.

Next stop is morning tea, which becomes lunch and then a late lunch. Tea and scones in the Jam Room of the Lynwood Cafe. Very civilised. They have an onion jam, ew. Bec fortunately buys another kind.

Next stop is the Dog on the Tuckerbox. A call from the Baruma (I'm in the Chanmobile), white smoke pouring out the back they say, they've pulled over they say. We agree that they should limp along to Gunning and we'll meet them there, fingers crossed that they'll make it. While we're waiting for the girls to drive in I call Ferris. He says that the oil is probably out, and if it's out then the engine seizes up and you have to replace the whole engine, not cheap. The car does indeed make it to Gunning, no repeat of the incident. We talk to the mechanic at Gunning, there's plenty of oil, so that's not the problem but it would be bad to break down in the country and have to be towed to civilisation. He says go home now, see how far the car will get. Ferris tells me that the web says it may also have been radiator fluid leaking into the engine through a broken head. He says flip a coin as to whether we go on or not. Bec's father says either a broken oil ring or a broken piston ring. We agree to try to get to Canberra, stay the night there and then hire a car for the trip. It seems like a good solution except that I wanted to avoid Canberra like the plague. You understand why, don't pretend you don't.

Fortunately False Dan's dad Paul (soon FalseDad) is hiring a room in Canberra while he's on call at the hospital and it happens to have six spare beds in it. Convenient, suspiciously so. We drop off our stuff, clean up and chat. He's more than a little of a nerd. Thai before The Prestige is surprisingly good for a backwater like Canberra. Bec's opening gambit is to tell Paul FalseDad what's wrong with the medical profession in Australia today, but the conversation soon turns to fixing all the problems with health care in Australia, preferably by the end of the week. They argue while we snarf. The film is also very good, see it before you hear spoilers (not that there's anything to spoil).

Thursday wasn't supposed to be this complicated.

Free breakfast at Boffins. It's not made clear whether we're eating with Boffins or eating Boffins, seemingly the latter. Drop Baruma off at the garage, hire a car, get on the road. Damn blood wave! We don't quite make it to Gundagai for lunch and instead eat next to a submarine. Final stretch to Undera, everyone's pretty stuffed. We get in the queue for the event and watch the sun slowly set. Tickets to check, cars to search, etc. The flies descend. Night falls.

Again we're setting up tents in the dark, must be karma. Check out the marketplace and three floors which are going, grab some pizza. Later we're lying on the carpet, huddling under sleeping bags. FD points out the Shopping Trolley constellation. I spotted the Badger and the Chinese Dragon. There's a long discussion about satellites, stationary orbits and which way is north anyway. Lots of shooting stars, or satellites, or planes. Keeping food in your mouth pouch is a useful way to always have sustenance on hand. You must first train with peanuts and mints before you can move on to the more difficult macadamia nuts and walnuts. It would be useful to have a form apology letter which you could quickly tick boxes and throw at someone as you point and laugh at them as you drive past. "Dear [] Sir [] Madam [] Indeterminate, we would like to sincerely [] apologise [] congratulate [] commiserate [] deny all knowledge of [] on [] for laughing at [] your fine [] incredible [] highly noticeable _______________. It is simply that you [] looked like our friend _______ from a distance [] were wearing a ridiculous hat which looked like you were a plantation owner from Panama [] have the h0tness rly bad.... [INSERT HERE: BLANK HUMAN DIAGRAM TO SKETCH OFFENDING ITEM OR OBJECT OF HILARITY / DESIRE]" Also at www.bobspotting.org.au you'll find all the information you need to know about the daily activities of Bob Brown, much of which is presented in a diary format. "Dear Diary, today the President of the Senate did the most beastly thing. If there were more people hugging then perhaps we'd be able to put aside our differences and jolly well get on with saving the planet." "Dear Diary, today I saw the loveliest Banksia I've seen in a while. Since the 17th of September last year to be precise. I tried to get Kerry to walk out with me to have a look, but she said she had a lot of reading she had to do for work. Sometimes I think you have to take time out for the little things." Bec decides that if she's ever a fashion designer her signature colour is dirty flesh. In summary, we giggle for eight hours and then crash.

And from the freezing cold to the sweltering heat. It's impossible to sleep. The only up side is that you either get the flies or the hot wind in your face, but not both at the same time. Swimming in the river helps a lot.

Willpower sapping Hare Krishna food for dinner. Tasty. The hard trance floor was surprisingly bad. So most of our time is spent at Hydratrance. There's a guy doing fire dancing in a total fire ban area. This official shows up to tell him off, but doesn't actually touch him or anything. He's just walking around the guy, very close, again and again and again just talking non-stop telling him off. He wraps up his show, but slowly. A walk in the woods discussing the future and matters of import. Changing Minds is mentioned.

Pack up, always easier than you think, and take a leisurely drive to Albury. Hotel room, beds, showers! Let's order Thai, ah, of course we're in Hicksville. Delivered pizza? Ah, no. Well then into town to see what's on at the cinema. Are you serving food? You? Of course Sunday afternoon is an unreasonable time to expect to find food. Finally some sandwiches and Blue Heaven's. They don't taste much of blue. We pick up beers and dessert for dinner and head back. What's on the tele? Excalibur? It can't get much worse than Excalibur, nap time. Aaaand I wake to The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants. Or maybe this is just one of those nightmares where you think you're waking to an awful teen chickflick but in reality you're still asleep. No such luck. Well, we'll get some DVDs from reception and watch something funny tonight. After a vote that is Clueless. God hates me as much as I hate him.

The car's fine? It just had too much oil? Well, that's a relief, I guess. Final dash to Sydney. Well, that was an adventure.